Thursday's Thoughts

A woman is cited for disorderly conduct. For yelling profanity. In her own home. At her toilet.

In other news, her boss says that she will not be punished for her run in with the law. On the contrary, she may be promoted for being good for morale.

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Not all criminals are idiots. This guy seemed to have a pretty clever gig going.

Gibson was driving a stolen box trailer, taken from Central Food Equipment on Reynolds Road in Lakeland in 2005, deputies said. The trailer had been outfitted with two tanks with a capacity of 3,250 gallons of fuel.

Gibson rigged a trap door in the bottom of the trailer and parked over the underground fuel tanks at gas stations. Deputies said he would drop a hose into the tanks and use marine batteries to pump the gas into the trailer.

He would unload the fuel into larger tanks at his business, Crews Towing, at the Recker Highway property, authorities said. Gibson would sell the fuel at $1.80 a gallon, authorities said.

Who wants to bet he got caught because he was reselling the gas too cheap?

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Alabama man finds a better way to get his house cleaned than hiring the nearest illegal alien. He catches a burglar in the act, and makes him clean the house at gun point.

Adrian McKinnon held the suspect -- Tajuan Bullock, 33, of 2963 University Drive -- at gunpoint and told him to sit on the floor until he de­cided what he was going to do, she said.

"We made this man clean up all the mess he made, piles of stuff, he had thrown out of my drawers and cabi­nets onto the floor," she said.

Once police arrived, Bul­lock complained to them about being forced at gun­point to clean up the home.

"This man had the nerve to raise sand about us mak­ing him clean up the mess he made in my house," she said. "The police officer laughed at him when he complained and said anybody else would have shot him dead.

"That made the man shut up."

What a beautiful story. I love it when people get to serve as their own judge and jury.

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Why do I send my children to private school, you ask?

A school board on Wednesday approved birth control pills and patches for students at a middle school in Portland, Maine. Condoms were already available.

The sixth through eighth grade students at King Middle School will be able to get the contraceptives at their student health center.

Opponents cited religious and health objections. Supporters said students often can't discuss sexuality with their parents.

Imagine that! A sixth grader being hasseled by his parents over a few birth control pills. These knuckle draggin neanderthal parents just slay me.

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And now, for those fast hitting news stories you seek at the beginning of the newscast.

In sports, how do the Colorado Rockies keep winning, you ask? Ask their new player - God.

Today's non-Vick cruelty to animals award goes to some guy in England. Wow. I can't condone it. I mustn't. Won't do it.

In weather, Florida storms destroy a church day care and a beer tent at an Oktoberfest. Oh the humanity! (For either one, I reckon.)

Day (Season) 7 is coming (note the new address). Sometime. The new trailer comes out in Times Square on October 25. Even if Hillary is elected, Jack will protect us.

For Camojack: new 24 cast member Carly Pope:



Yeah, it would have been better if she were holding a beer or riding a motorcycle. You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

Finally, if you think the Feds are getting soft on punishment, read this legal yarn about Amtrak.