What They Say -- What They Mean

White House reporter Judy Keen, with the help of Ari Fleischer, has put out a little chart regarding President Bushisms during his press conferences. The chart compares what W says, when he says it and why he says it. For example:

President Bush

What he says: "I appreciate that question."
When he says it: Several times during each press conference, usually after a complex or tricky question.
Why he says it/What he means: It means he needs a second to collect his thoughts.

Well, some other public figures have had their sayings collected and explained.

Al Gore

What he says: "HE PLAYED ON OUR FEARS."
When he says it: The Presidential campaign season.
What he means: "I'm so depressed. How did I lose to Bush?"

What he says: "The next ice age is coming."
What he says it: The 1970s.
What he means: I don't know what the Helk I'm talking about. In 25 years, I'm going to be talking about global warming.

What he says: "I invented the internet."
When he says it: During Presidential campaing season.
What he means: "I was almost in Congress when a government task force that created a network that was later expanded into something that kind of became the world wide web was funded by Congress. I would have voted for it."

Lame Stream Media Reporter

What they say: "Mr. President . . . ."
When they say it: Whenever the President is walking to a helicopter.
What they mean: "I hate America. I am a leftie commie supporting bed wetting military hating hack. Whatever you say, I will twist it in the headline to make you sound evil or stupid."

Howard Dean:

What he says: "We're gonna win Vermont. ThenOregonn. Then Oklahoma. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!"
When he says it: After getting his butt kicked in a primary.
What he means: "I'm one crazy bastard. And I didn't take my medicine this morning."

Michael Moore:

What he says: "I would like to interview you for a my documentary."
When he says it: When he has a camera crew.
What he means: "I want to ask you argumentative questions then carefully splice the film to misrepresent what you actually said. Boy, I sure am hungry. Do you want the rest of that sandwich?"

What he says: "I am a documentary film maker."
When he says it: Lots.
What he means: "I use false information and misleading spliced film clips to make anti-American, anti-capitalistic propaganda. Boy, I am sure hungry. Do you want the rest of that sandwich?"

What he says: "Hi."
When he says it: Several times per day.
What he means: "Bush is a Nazi fascist. Boy, I am sure hungry. Do you want the rest of that sandwich?"

What he says: "Bush is a Nazi fascist."
When he says it: Several times per day.
What he means: "Boy, I am sure hungry. Do you want the rest of that sandwich?"

What he says: "Boy, I am sure hungry. Do you want the rest of that sandwich?"
When he says it: Every 15 minutes.
What he means: "Bush is a Nazi fascist. Boy, I am sure hungry. Do you want the rest of that sandwich?"

This charts would be helpful in lots of areas, don't you think.

If you have one, please share.