True Heart Wrenching Story

So I'm sitting in my office trying to protect the Man when two office workers enter. I recognized them since they worked in a file room down the hall, but I did not know either one's name. One of them introduces herself and asks me if I would be willing to give some money to the Heart Walk, which she is organizing for our office.

Here is a re-enactment of our conversation.

KJ: "What is that?"

Office chick: "It is for the American Heart Association."

KJ: "But I'm anti-heart."

Office chick: "How is that?"

KJ: "I just am. I am against hearts. Especially bleeding hearts. The heart is just a muscle, and overrated at that."

Office chick: "I need my heart."

KJ: "Then you should go to law school."

Office chick: "I plan to."

KJ: "Then give it time. You will learn how to live without your heart soon enough."

I gave her some desk drawer money and sent her on her way.